So, making friends in the year below you is both a great thing and a sad thing. It gives you a reason to go back to university for the odd party, to hang out sometimes just to chill, pretending you are still a student. It’s great, It’s fun and It allows you more space and a chance to re-live those moments again. However, it also sucks. You see the photos posted on face book from the events you weren’t at. You see the status about the in-jokes you’ll not understand. You have had your time, and you realise It’s time to let someone else have a turn of being the 3rd year. It’s hard and while your having to make plans for the real world you get to see others get excited for freshers week, for another year, worrying about what they are going to write for their dissertation, planning birthdays and get aways. And It just makes life after university all that more difficult.
I wish I could wave a magic wand and say life after university is swell and fun and easy, but really It’s the worst I’ve felt in a long time. In my first year of university I almost made the decision to leave. Looking back I know how much of a mistake that would have been. So if anyone actually reads this who is still at university, make the most of it.
I’ve graduated and I’ve made my way home. I’ve unpacked and everything is the way it was three years ago. Well almost, I don’t get to look forward to go to uni, instead I get to worry and panic about what it is I’m going to do with my life now. I’ve been back three days and already I’m ready to leave. Don’t get me wrong I love my family but I have nothing of my own now. I went from having a plan (to graduate) and now….nothing.
I hate not doing anything. I have my hopes held on an internship for a company called creative loaf, It’s not paid but It would mean I would be close to Ormskirk so I could see friends and would actually be doing something. I won’t hear back from it until after the end of the month, and then there’s no telling when I’ll hear from them. It’s hard to make any other plans until I hear from then in case I actually get the job. I’ve applied for a few jobs with the BBC. I know that If I don’t get the jobs at the BBC I won’t get any feedback, however If I get rejected from creative loaf and don’t get any feedback I’ll be calling, e-mailining, tweeting, etc to make sure why I didn’t get the role.
So, I’m currently living and sleeping on a friends living room floor when I’m not working for aim higher, and just last night i had finished my tea and was ready to just have a calm night in with my friends when i got a ext asking me to do a night shift for the summer schools. I’ve never done one before but had one coming up anyway, and as much as I would have liked to have stayed in with my friends the night shift money is good.
So I started at the disco, danced with the kids, did some dance games etc and have some fun. After the disco the kids go back to their halls for tea and toast before sleep. My group were really well behaved and I had no issues with them. After they went to bed It was my job to stay up till morning to keep an eye on the hall, so if the kids had any problems or if anything went wrong they could just come to me and I would be able to sort it. Thankfully there was no trouble making and my shift was easy. On night shift you work till 8am, I was going on until I reached the half four mark, it was at this point I had become bored and just wanted to sleep. But oddly at six my body started to wake up, at 7 I woke the boys up and we went of for breakfast . As soon as I had finished mine I was back to my room to sleep for a few hours.
Next time I definitely need to bring a few movies with me.
So, I’ve just finished my first summer school shift. I’ll first explain what the means, I work for aim higher, we take kids from primary and second schools and show them around the uni and give them a taste of the lessons they could study if they came to a university. The summer schools are a little different in that they spend the night in halls and get a bigger experience. They have a few lessons and then at the end of the night they get to party in the venue at the disco. This is my first and last time working on the summer schools as aim higher will sadly be no more after this year but to government budget cuts, that and I’ll be graduating.
So, after a very long day, some really interesting lessons and a crazy night a the disco I am very very VERY tired 🙂 But a good tired. I can honestly say that tonight was the best time I’ve ever been to the venue (and I was sober!) Who knew getting year nines to dance and party could be so much fun? 🙂
Anyway, It’s late now and I need to get some sleep, theres work to be done tomorrow and I am VERY TIRED! (I can hear the kids being sent to their rooms by the night staff so hopefully I should get some sleep now)
Yeah so mini breaks are not fun. I know my blogs haven’t exactly been the most uplifting of late, but thats the real world and If I have to face it so do you! These mini break downs will just hit you. The strong, sharp, painful relaistion that you are leaving university, it’s all over, you will not see your friends as much, you will live with your paretns and you will hate it.
These happen out of the blue, today I was at work where I was looking at my last ever shifts with aim higher, it then hit me after my last shift I would have to go home. That’s how I would end my time at university. It hurt, it made me feel sick and I wanted to curl up in to a ball and stay there. Doesn’t really help when your supposed to working with others who are trying to be up beat and cheery.
I also found I may be some what homeless, as I did not work out my last shifts with my rent, so……yeah……looking for a place to stay.
So on the 20th June I have to leave my student rented house, my house mates have already started packing and I should be doing the same. But I have yet to start, this isn’t because I’m lazy (well a little) it’s more about it being my space, sure the house isn’t perfect and my room is tiny but it’s my little room, my space, my house. I’ve been living here for two years, in that time our living room has changed it’s layout a number of times, the kitchen table had moved to every single spot in the kitchen and I have moved my bed and torn down a wardrobe in my room. (well my dad tore it down, I’m just not that strong). I painted a blackboard on my wall and I created a space (be it a small one) that I could call my own. I love my family and every now and then I miss home but I don’t want to go back and I think this is a problem all students leaving uni must face, going from living your own life with your own rules to going back to someone else’s home and rules. I’ll be living not in my house but my parents. I know there is always a place for me back at home with my parents but I’ve gotten used to living my way. So I’ve been making plans.
Go home, get a rubbish job for six months, see how I am money wise and if I can go travel
Plan A .5
Go home, get rubbish job but also look for media related jobs, If I get a media related job in manchester save up and move in to my own place in manchester.
Pray that I am taken on in new york or LA with the job I’ve been wanting for a while and live the american dream
……well I don’t really have a plan C….
Yeah……..I’m looking at my friends as they pack up, help them get it in their car and can’t help but think that it sucks.
One of the final films created by the group I am in called Northern Monster for our university degree. I wrote the script, directed and produced. I am so happy with how it has all come together, the edit is great, the colour grading is perfect, the sound is spot on, the camera work is ace and the performances are wonderful. Thank you to everyone that helped with this short. 🙂
So you’ve finished your classes, handed in all your work and are finally free from all your exams. You have summer to look forward to but you have chosen to stay at uni for a little bit. But what are you going to do with all that free time now? Sure you have your mates but their not always around. I’ve been asking myself this and sure I’m been coming up with new film ideas and planning out what I’m need to get, actors, props, etc but I can’t just plan films all the time. So to fight boredom I went to the internet where I found some handy suggestions, however the best I think is this.
‘Do a little dance. Turn some music on and move around. Dancing can help get your mind working on a new way to fight boredom. If dancing isn’t your thing, turn the music on and really listen to it. ‘
Now I’m all up for jumping up and getting groovy but how does one ‘really’ listen to music…..I mean ‘realllllllllly’ listen to it. Next they’ll get me see the music in all it’s different colours.
So what should I do to keep from napping all day? Any suggestions, lemmi know.
Yesterday I handed in my last piece of work for university. Ever. I’m all done. No more work to do. You’d think I’d be happy about it, and to extent I am. However all I can think about is what on earth am I supposed to do now? I’ll be hanging around uni until July as I’m working the summer schools for Aim Higher but really what am I going to do with my life. In a wonderland I’ll get a job in new york or LA and I’ll be able to move over their and do what I love, making content for online viewing. However life isn’t that easy. I’ll have to go home get a job I don’t want and save up. Maybe I’ll travel, maybe I’ll get a job at the BBC, but right now there is nothing scary than looking down the empty void that is currently my future.
Wow, that was cheery. errrrrrr quick think of something happy. PUPPIES! RAINBOWS! SUNSHINE! 😀